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Long live love 5 relationship tips for lasting happiness as a couple

Oh, could love always stay the same as it did on the first day! So exciting and new, sleep-depriving and wonderful. But of course things change in a relationship over time. But different doesn't necessarily mean worse! If you pay attention to a few things from the beginning, you can ensure that love remains permanent and even becomes deeper and more intimate over the years.

Dr. med. Verena Breitenbach, author ('Female pleasure without taboos', Kösel Verlag) and specialist, explains to us the golden rules for lasting love happiness. She says: "If you treat yourself and your partner carefully and observe a few important rules, you can be happy together for a long time." Here are the tips from the expert:

Relationship tip # 1: don't give up!

"It may sound strange, but the most important thing is that each of the partners has a good relationship with themselves first," explains Dr. Breitenbach.

"You can't give up in a partnership just to please the other person. Of course, compromises are important in a relationship, but you have to ask yourself: Will I be fine in the long term?" Otherwise, in the long run, dissatisfaction will arise among those who constantly withdraw. And: You stay exciting for your partner if you have your own interests and pursue them.

The expert's advice:
It's all a question of balance: everyone needs time for their partner, but also time for themselves. For example, for the girls' get-together or the sports course. When you meet again, you have something to talk about. And that keeps every relationship fresh.

Also read: Me instead of us: How to stay yourself in a long-term relationship

Relationship tip # 2: tenderness

"Every relationship needs tenderness. It can also be very small touches, for example a brief hug or a kiss in between. Touches are so important because the body releases oxytocin, the bonding hormone," says the expert.

Unfortunately, touch in longer relationships takes place less and less. Joint conversations also become rarer over time. "Statistically speaking, a couple only speaks eight minutes a day. Conversations and touch are extremely important! They are the be-all and end-all of a relationship."

The expert's advice:
Point 1: You should touch and touch your partner - even 'just like that'. So intimacy and tenderness stay alive. Point 2: create rituals. "There should be fixed times for love. Times in which to-do lists and everyday stress are left out and you really have your head free for the other."

Also read: Tips against boredom: This is how you bring momentum into the relationship

Relationship tip # 3: culture of controversy

What if stress and everyday life wear out love? What if you are actually much too exhausted to deal intensively with your partner? When arguments end up in arguments more and more often?

The expert's advice:
"Regular discussions help here too. Discuss your problems with one another! The rule here is: Always stay fair and use I-messages. Instead of: 'You always do ...!' better: 'I have the feeling that you ...'. It is important not to argue hurtful or even below the belt. "

And one more thing: "You should limit the discussions to a certain period of time and say clearly: Let's talk about it properly now, but not constantly and every now and then. That way the relationship will keep its positive mood."

Also read: From household to offspring: The 4 biggest relationship problems and how you can cope with them

Also read: Get out of the relationship routine: this is how you seduce your partner

Relationship tip # 4: passion and dedication

"Within a partnership you have to be able to trust each other, especially sexually. You should stay open and curious and talk about your own sexual desires," said Dr. Breitenbach. Anyone who only makes love after the crime scene on Sunday evenings will quickly notice that routine creates security. But routine is dangerous when it comes to sex.

Of course, sex shouldn't be an extra item on your to-do list now! Nobody needs to worry about not having sex at least five times a week. It's about quality, not quantity.

The expert's advice:
"Especially during sex you should listen to your own intuition. Devotion means: turn off your head, feel and accept pleasure. Sex is pleasure, pleasure and sensuality. Problems and everyday worries should be ignored (if possible)."

Also read: Spice up your love life: Put an end to the lull in sex in a long-term relationship

Also read: Is that tingling missing? 6 tips to keep the long-term relationship exciting

Relationship tip # 5: respect & tolerance

It's often the simple things that keep love alive. Curiosity about the other, for example. But also the willingness to accept him for who he is.

The expert advises:
"One should realize: my partner is not responsible for my happiness in life. I am myself! Unfortunately, many people tend to see the partner as the savior who brings eternal happiness. Those who break away from this thought can do the other accept him for who he really is - and leave him as he is, "says Dr. Breitenbach.

You can find tons of other relationship tips here.

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And another tip from the expert: "You should be grateful that the other is there - and tell him that too."

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