What is the best marriage agency in Singapore

(SZ of July 24, 2003) - She is slim and slim, a shoulder-free Deuxpièces underlines the figure in purple, and black hair frames a flawless face with alert almond eyes.

The admiring glances and appreciative whistles of the papagalli would be Chua Nan-Sze in Italy. In Singapore, however, only the birds whistle, all year round, as if they wanted to forget the hostile climate that prevails here.

The dwarf state on the equator has made such a career as an economic hub for Southeast Asia that most of the four million inhabitants live fully air-conditioned in the midst of a lush, manicured park landscape and work at full speed, often 60 hours a week.

They are trained from childhood on for achievement and success, in the service of the fatherland, the community and the family.

Zero spring fever

There is little time left for other thoughts - and everything that could arouse erotic fantasies in the little free time that remains is prevented by the censorship.

May the butterflies flutter around incessantly between orchids, banana and mango trees: There are no spring fever, even when the biological clock is ticking unmistakably.

"Aiyah, what haven't I tried," says Chua Nan-Sze, running a hand through his shoulder-length hair. The 27-year-old has put out her feelers in all directions since she returned home from Canada, where she studied: "Prince Charming does not fall from the sky, as many Singaporean women still believe," the high school teacher is convinced.

Speed ​​dating

Hardly a month goes by in which she does not take part in a tasting or a sports course, a vacation trip or a so-called speed dating, a rendezvous every seven minutes, with the one goal of finding a partner for life.

Chua Nan-Sze is a member of a lonely hearts club that is exclusively open to academics and bears the meaningful name "lovebyte".

It is run officially by the government, which is concerned about the continued existence of the small people.

The Singaporean women give birth to an average of 1.45 children in their lifetime. The population is shrinking and - as in Germany and Switzerland - is getting older.

In addition, the Chinese, who make up three quarters of the population and set the tone politically and economically, are far less fertile than the Malays and Indians.

In the island state, this feeds the old fear of one day being overrun by its large neighbor Malaysia, from which it only painfully split off in 1965.

An old maid at 30

Singapore would not be Singapore if it simply put up with the decline in population. With wise foresight, the government set up the Office for Social Development, or SDU (Social Development Unit) for short, as early as 1984.

The agency's job is to ensure more weddings and children among the students, the vast majority of whom are of Chinese descent.

A sister agency for the uneducated rest of the population was founded a little later. Together they mediate a third of the 19,000 marriages that are concluded in Singapore each year.

This suggests the thought of George Orwell, who in his novel "1984" outlined the horrific vision of a society that was brought into line, in which the state literally regulates everything.

Tan-Huang Shuo-Mei does not want to hear about it: "I am living proof of what the SDU is capable of." At the age of 30, with which women in Asia are usually written off as old maids, she found her husband through the state marriage agency, the communications manager of a polytechnic.

Kind of a development worker

Meanwhile, 15 years later, she has three daughters and is the director of the state marriage agency, which resides in a colonial villa with a secluded park.

The plump woman in a pastel yellow costume sees herself as a kind of development worker. She considers tutoring in "the art of communication, establishing and maintaining relationships" to be necessary, especially with the male part of the population.

Accordingly, the SDU not only offers the classic marriage brokerage, which, according to Tan-Huang Shuo-Mei, requires a certain degree of maturity, but also a contact platform and a social program.

Bingo and treasure hunt

The participants are given a brochure entitled "Mix 'n' Match", which contains instructions for games such as bingo and treasure hunts, so that they can get to know each other in an informal way. The offer is rounded off by seminars on the topic: "How do I avoid marrying a fool?"

The cooking class didn't meet his taste. "A scary amount of butter and eggs went into the soufflé," notes Zach Chia dryly. The lanky 30-year-old with the trendy pissing madman traditionally prefers it, perhaps precisely because he has an unconventional background.

Growing up as the son of a taxi driver and a seamstress, he learned to stand on his own two feet at an early age. In his youth, says Zach Chia, he suffered from "emotional deficiency" at home because his parents were simply overworked, at high school and university he was "an outsider" as a student trainee among all the spoiled children Parents. He found security in the Salvation Army.

Lousy lovers

The engineer who sells software for hotels dreams of "flourishing" with a "warm, helpful and homely woman".

Until then, he lives with his parents - this is the rule for unmarried people in Singapore - in a social housing. The modest family situation has so far put off most female academics, explains Zach Chia with a shrug.

No trace of any clarification

"You have high material demands on a future husband." There is just as little talk of passion in state marriage initiation as there is of enlightenment.

The legislature is of the opinion that sexuality is only appropriate in the context of marriage, for reproductive purposes.

Conclusion: The Singaporeans are lousy lovers. Only one in four men and one in ten women of childbearing age want sex more than six times a month.

Best seller Viagra

That puts them at the bottom of a survey that the condom manufacturer Durex had carried out in 22 countries last year.

The potency is already being helped with all sorts of Chinese remedies and with Viagra, the best-selling drug in the city-state.

Tingling not so important

"Dear Frau Doktor Love," writes a lonely heart on the Internet, "I've been going out with a guy two years older who only talks about his work for some time. He bores me. But conscientious and responsible as he is, he has." the stuff of a good husband. "

The tingling sensation is not important, her friends advised, good-looking boys cannot be relied on. "Is that so?" The clerk wants to know. "Finding the perfect man is difficult," replies the mailbox aunt at the address lovebyte.org.sg. "Set priorities."

Another counselor said: "I recently met a woman I would like to spend the rest of my life with. However, for some inexplicable reason, I get embarrassed when I stand across from her. What is the matter with me?"

The vernacular dismisses the participants in the SDU programs as "single, desperate and ugly" - "alone, desperate and ugly". It is true, says Chua Nan-Sze, that women are on average far more open-minded, more agile and attractive than men, but at least through the government organization she met her first boyfriend.

The search for the cute young thing

"He was of Indian descent. The ethnic difference has proven to be an insurmountable hurdle over time."

Since the separation a year ago, the high school teacher has been solo again. She sighs: "Most of the Chinese men at the SDU are, to be honest, either clumsy or neglected. The valuable rest of them enjoy the huge selection of beautiful women on their own - and those who really want to commit look out for a cute boy Thing."

But she measures 1.68 meters and is marching towards 30: "Maybe I should look for a suitable husband in the West."

(sueddeutsche.de)