Should be teenagers in relationships

Everyday family life in the corona crisis

"... and you were such a sweet child ..." is the lyrics of the lyrics, the content of which spreads the decay of youth, namely that a young person does not respect the parents' career aspirations, does not dress properly, always listens to noisy music and with friends " hanging around "that would be worthless.

"Support me, but don't hold me tight!"

It seems that the parents no longer have any influence over these young people and fear the worst for their “darling”. Biographies, literature and personal
Experience actually shows changes in the years between the ages of 12 and 18, especially in the relationship and mutual contact between parents and children. Children grow up to be teenagers and young adults who have to cope with life independently and in the best case also master this. But this also means that they have to let go of things and change situations and ways of life that could hinder and slow them down on this path to independence. You need to be open to building new relationships. This often takes a lot of energy to give up good old habits. But nature supports young people in this phase by the fact that brain development and activities in the hormonal household make it easier for adolescents to mature into a stable personality that has to struggle with the values ​​conveyed by a family in question and the entire structure of relationships on the To turn upside down.
For parents, this means that they become a rubbing tree that has resilient bark. The warmth of the nest that has worn so beautifully is replaced by rubbing warmth that allows change.
I recognize my limits at the limits of the other. To test these and to exceed them now and then shows me my possibilities but also the effects of my actions.
A lot is exceeded and tested at this age, especially when it comes to communication, as a parent you very often come up against your limits. Here, however, there is also the best possible course of action for parents to stay in relationship and contact with their children, despite turbulent times and demands. Young people don't want us to give them up. They find nothing worse than when father and mother turn away from them and convey to them that we do not accept you.
Kurt Finger described it very appropriately in the following saying:
“Support me, but don't hold me tight!
Come with me, but take back!
Take me seriously, but let me try!
Caress me, but be my grater at the same time!
Always be there, but rarely make an appearance!
Treat me with respect, but hold out
that I (still) don't always know the limit! "